Andy's Mind

I went today to watch the sunset over the fields.

I live on the edge of the city, literarily. On the other side of the street there are fields stretching for miles to the West, without any buildings or anything to obstruct the view – only far, on the horizon roofs of nearby town can be seen complete with a church tower. There is an unpaved country road going right through the middle of those fields, used mainly by the farmers who own them and people from the apartment buildings on my side of the street who walk there, mostly dog owners. That’s where I went on the bike to watch as the sun was going down.

It was rather empty today, no one working and just a few strollers on the horizon. And it was quite cold, despite weather being quite fair, with skies mostly clear. And it was very calm, as usual there. The magic of this place is that it’s just a mile or so from the city yet when you face the setting sun the city is behind your back so you don’t hear nor feel it, it might as well disappear for a while. There is just wind and some birds from a distance.

Watching the sun setting brings peace, puts everything that happens in my life into prospective. But then there is some melancholy in it, longing to go where the sun sets. I think I didn’t travel too long, living in one place makes me sick in the long run. I feel imprisoned by my circumstances and when I watch the sun go there over this distant town I promise myself that I would go too… soon…

On Friday I borrowed a bike from a friend of mine, who doesn’t use it recently (they have a small kid and no time). I’ve made around 50 miles since then, which is not much but given the fact that I wasn’t riding a bicycle for more than a year I think it’s pretty good. I feel better overall and I spend now at least an hour every day on the bike.

Starting this Wednesday (tomorrow is a national holiday out here) I plan to go to work on the bike. It would be much more fun. Unless it would rain, of course.

While sitting in meditation yesterday I saw how much mental junk litters my mind. But I also saw it is not it. There is lots of work ahead of me before I’ll be able to just sit.

It is actually quite nice to have a cat or two. I have two, the fat, black one and the thin, grey one. Sure, they meow sometimes and you don’t understand a word of what they are saying. And yes, their daily schedule includes a wild morning run at around 5 AM. Five days ago Basil, the grey one, woke me up at around this hour by meowing loudly. It turned out he just needed to be stroked and comforted some. The fatso, in turn, likes to come to my bed at night and snuggle against my arm purring happily. And yes, there are bowls to fill and a tray to empty each day. And yes, their fur is everywhere, literarily. Traveling with them would be a major trouble too, therefore I always organize someone to take care of them while I’m gone (which is also not that easy, few people like emptying cat’s trays).

But, I have to admit, that I really like these guys.